oh, baby cupid. answer my questions for me.

I am becoming those crazy girls where I am constantly thinking what can he possibly be doing rigtht now? what IS he doing right now? I wonder if he treats other girls like he treats me? Why hasn't he texted me for so long.. Wonder if he's bored of me, already. I don't want to be those clingy girls where I keep texting & checking up on him. Never was & never will. We're not even going out for god sake. I think the reason why I am so paranoid is partly because I have been in some pretty awful relationships. Where trust wasn't giving to me, I had to earn it. Where I can't trust anyone, anymore. Where I've been lied to, but I am so over it. There's a reason why I am not with him. Past is the past. I just want this paranoid bug off me. Like I said, we're not even going out.. then why am I like this? because i've started having feelings for him? It's kinda scary but exciting in a way. I am well aware that it's going to wear off soon. I have school to worry about! I don't have time to DATE. Am I just making up excuses because I am scared to get so close to someone again. excuses excuses excuses. I don't know wtf I want. I can't make up my mind. WHAT.. ON .. EARTH.. DO .. I WANT!

olympic break, please.

Oh essays, how I hate you so. You wasted half of my day when I could've been studying for more important things. I need more hours in a day and I need less distractions!! facebook + youtube .. go away :( I am still working on my essay right now but I lost my train of thoughts & I'm running out of things to bullshit. For those who told me sociology is really interesting.. well i got news for you, IT'S NOT. It's so boring. I can't even read a whole chapter without stopping & asking myself.. WHY THE FUCK DID I TAKE SOCIOLOGY? It's HARD to study for something I am NOT interested in. Shoot and I have an exam tomorrow! I wish I knew earlier, dropped out of it & took something else.