Guys Phrases Translated

I bought the February Cosmopolitan issue today and I find this article so interesting and funny! but I am going to list a few since there's 50 guys phrases & i don't feel like typing them all out!

D A T I N G:
-HE SAYS: "I'm pretty much single."
HE MEANS: "I have a girlfriend, but you're hot."
-HE SAYS: "I'm not looking for a relationship."
HE MEANS: "I really just want to do you."
-HE SAYS: "Shall we split the check?"
HE MEANS: "I'm not into you."
-HE SAYS: "My ex is crazy."
HE MEANS: "I screwed her over, and she got upset."
-HE SAYS: "Your friend is great!"
HE MEANS: "If I weren't seeing you, I would go for your friend."
R E L A T I O N S H I P:
-HE SAYS: "My friends loved you when they met you!"
HE MEANS: "I think I may love you too."
-HE SAYS: "I'm sorry I haven't called."
HE MEANS: "I'm not sorry but I don't want to deal with your wrath."
-HE SAYS: "I'm not going to change."
HE MEANS: "I don't have the balls to break up with you, so I'm going to force you to dump me."
-HE SAYS: "My mom is like that around new people."
HE MEANS: "My mom isn't a fan of yours."

D U D E B E H A V I O R:
-HE SAYS: "I thought I knew her."
HE MEANS: "I was checking her out."
-HE SAYS: "I don't get why girls like him"
HE MEANS: "I''m feeling insecure, so say something reassuring."
-HE SAYS: "My friend is so whipped!"
HE MEANS: "I'm a little hurt that my buddy is choosing a chick over me."

A P P E A R A N C E S:
-HE SAYS: "You look hot."
HE MEANS: "Can we have sex later?"
-HE SAYS: "Isn't that a little revealing for girl's night?"
HE MEANS: "I don't want guys hitting on you."
-HE SAYS: "That's a new look."
HE MEANS: "You look weird."

S E R I O U S D I S C U S S I O N S:
-HE SAYS: "I just need some space."
HE MEANS: "I want out."
-HE SAYS: "Why are you being so emotional?"
HE MEANS: "Why are you acting like a psycho?"
-HE SAYS: "You're being such a girl."
HE MEANS: "I don't understand you at all."
S E X:

-HE SAYS [WHILE IN BED]: "I love you."
HE MEANS: " I love the sex that I have with you."
-HE SAYS: "How many guys have you been with?"
HE MEANS: "Tell me I'm the best you've had."
-HE SAYS: "I don't masturbate all that often."
HE MEANS: "I masturbate more often than you wash your hands."
-HE SAYS: "Did you finish?"
HE MEANS: "I hope you finished, because I finished and, boy, am I sleepy!"

Interesting eh?